the first time i saw a penis belonged to brian f.  at the time i had a crush on him and to this day i still have no idea how i ended up in that bathroom at my friends'' new years eve party with him, but i did... and what seemed sudden and out of the blue, he unzipped his pants to show me his weiner.  i sat and stared for what seemed like forever,  it was as though i had just seen a car crash with peoples' heads having just gotten decaptiated before my very eyes- that was the utter shock i was experiencing.   so many racing thoughts:  how do you have sex?!  how do you have a baby!?!?!  OH MY GOD i never want to have sex, ever.  this was also the first time i had drank alcohol.   and with a huge smile on his face and bud light bottle in hand with it all hanging out he said, "i showed you mine, now you show me yours!"  it was like a bad after school special and had been quite sheltered.  i was 16.  sitting in this bathroom, so small, not even a shower, it truly just had a toilet and sink, terrified of being "date" raped from my "friend" just like mom warned me of all those years.  without skipping a beat i got up, unlocked the door and flew out of there.  his drunken bobble head followed where i was going with a very confused look on his face as i ran.  i ran for safety.